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Shit, every fucking morning the same thing. This big thing is hard as hell; I've really got to take a leak, but I'm too damn tired to get up. Well, if I hold this piece of meat really tight, it always helps me delay having to get up. I'm going to have to learn not to drink any water after three in the afternoon; some guy once told me he learned that in a survival course up in the frozen north.Ooh, that feels good, big guy; do you like it? You always like it when I rub it, don't you, fella? Fast, slow, dry, lubricated, anything. Good thing we've got all these women around who are willing to rub it for us or my shoulder would be sore all the time. But instead of slaking my thirst, as it were, these delicious, wanton women make me so horny that I'm hard all the time. My sperm used to build up every couple of days; I would give Melissa a quick fuck and go to sleep. Now I need to get off every day, more than once, like a damn teenager.What do you say, big guy? Should I keep on going or. If you were cheating, you might be even more vague than usual about your day-to-day schedule. Well, women tend to take the opposite approach: They try to cover up their tracks by sharing even more information than normal. "She'll tell you lots of details about her day so you won't wonder what she's been up to and get suspicious," Paoletti says. Of course, she's leaving certain things out.3. ... while rifling through her bag.When he was working on his second book, Warning Signs, DeLorenzo researched how body language can tip you off to a cheater. What he found: If she puts her hands in her pockets, touches her face, or pokes around in her purse for something, it's a dead giveaway that she's pulling one over on you. "They're all signs of nervousness," he says.4. She stops texting as much.At first you may not even notice when she starts to lay off the Blackberry — but when you do, it may be time to worry. "Women who text a lot don't just suddenly stop," Paoletti explains. The more likely.
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