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It’s become a long-standing joke among my friends and comrades that I’ll be the most successful virgin since Jesus. I walked into the restaurant laughing. There before me stood this little, slight thing – ’bout five and a half feet tall (with high heels) long, long dark hair and this nervous look on her face. I always look at the face first – I believe the eyes are the gateway to the soul. If you can’t read what’s going on in a person’s eyes, get the hell away as fast as possible. I had to stand still for a moment and catch my breath. She was wearing this black dress…a sheath, really. The dress hung off of her upper arms, and it clung to her curves like it was painted on. It hung down to the tops of her knees (and what nice knees they were!), and she wore an anklet on her right leg. Her high heels were tied up her calves and she held a matching purse in finely manicured hands. And her hair! I love hair. Her hair just hung! I’m sure that the golden streaks were natural – they had a. I have a cell phone. I’ll call 911. Oh sweet Jesus, Annie.’ I was on my knees in front of her, fumbling like an idiot through my pockets for my phone, when her hands finally found my face. She hugged me to her chest, disturbingly ample for such a small person. ‘I’m OK, ya big doofus! I just moved too fast. The woman who took out my eyes was not a very good doctor. In fact, she was only about one step up from a witch doctor. She saved my life, but her technique left something to be desired. It just hurts if I move my head too fast. Oh. Oh No. Pooh?’ ‘What, Annie?’ ‘Pooh bear, are you crying?’ Her hands swept my face, gentle and cool. She lowered her forehead to mine. ‘I’m sorry Annie. I thought I’d hurt you. I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t stand that.’ ‘Silly old bear,’ She cooed, kissing my nose. ‘Take me home.’ I gave her my elbow and walked out of the terminal. As we walked we were quiet, just happy to be alone together. I helped her into my pickup (it is Oregon. We all have.
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