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So uh… shall I put the condom on or do you want to?” I fished the Trojan from my bra.He laughed, “I’ll have to be hard first for that to work.”Right! I felt like such a dork! On the other hand, I couldn’t blame myself too much, normally penises weren’t this big when they weren’t hard, and it was like an optical illusion or something. A cocktical illusion? No! Shut up! Dork!“Well, I mean… you know I’ve got a boyfriend. I’m not gonna… do stuff to it.” I mumbled awkwardly.“That’s fine, I can just take you home.” He said, casually starting to stuff it back into his pants.All too hasty I fumbled forward, “No! NO! I won fair and square!”He was clearly fighting the urge to laugh, “Alright, so how is this gonna work?”“I’llshowemtoyou.” I speed-mumbled at him.“What?” he said, genuinely not understanding what I’d just said.Abruptly I peeled the tank-top and bra up, letting my enormous pair bounce down and free; damned things have always been saggier than I might have liked, but if that. As Anna passed bags to me, we look up at the neighbouring houses. They were all in darkness but for one or two. The whole village looked isolated for the holiday. The thought of being absolutely left alone was a cheering one for us. All we wanted was peace, relaxation, and... some fun. "Hallo. Wie geht's?" A hardy voice behind us. We turned and as Teutonic a specimen of German health as you could imagine greeted us. "Ich heisse Christoph. Oder "Tophi"." He laughed at his nickname. He was tall, heavy set beneath the winter jacket that enveloped him, and had a hail-fellow-well-met demeanour which put us both at ease. From our fumbling German, he quickly discerned that English would be a preferred language for us. "Yes, the willage is quite deserted now. Most people come here in the Summer. It iss not zo exciting in Winter. There iss no skiing." "It is perfect for us," Anna added. "We just wanted a nice quiet break. Christmas can be exhausting." "I understand completely. It iss the.
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