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The sex I had with others was to fill my need and wasn't love but just fun. He was convinced that being married I could still enjoy as much sex with others as I did now.I still wasn't convinced and told him, I was worried things would change once we were married. Even though I could go a week or more without other men I knew deep down I was still a slut and being a married woman wouldn’t change that. I would still crave and want to have sex with other men. Frank understood, saying that was one of the reasons he loved me so much and didn’t see any reason that should affect our marriage nor should I changed just because I was married.The one thing he didn't like was when I called myself a slut, and he didn't want me doing that after we got married. He said I was more like a sex toy and he didn't mind sharing his toys. I accepted his proposal and he started calling me, his sex toy, which I definitely liked much better then slut. I called myself his fuck toy, as I was always ready to. Two days later I was hugging my mother tightly before boarding the trainback to Henty. There were tears aplenty both before boarding the trainand especially the evening before when Wendy came round with her motherto catch up with us and for Wendy to give me another large case of Lois'shand me downs!The evening I was back on the farm, I again faced close scrutiny asBernadette and Margaret unpacked Lois' suitcase (with me silently sittingon my bed,) watched carefully by both Foxy and my aunt. Most of theclothes were a bit too big for me yet, but Bernadette and Margaret sawpossible outfits they could alter to fit them. Even Foxy remarked on oneof Lois' outfits as she held up to herself in the mirror!The next 2 weeks saw me acclimatising to not only farm life and smalltown life as well, but also to the experience of a house full of women.Many were the suggestions made to me about changing mannerisms that Ineeded to change if I was to fit in with other country girls. The maintwo were my.
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