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When I was cleaning up my shit at home I found the last of my stash of crystal in a baggy. At first I was just going to throw it away. Then I thought I should give it to Elaine. And then I had a better idea."So here," I said holding out the bag. "You still want it right?"She came over immediately, now serious and tried to play it cool; as though she might be mildly interested. "Cool. Thanks."I smiled and playfully asked in a staccato rhythm, "You got the Glass-Dick-Jones?"She parried with, "That's crack, smart guy." She had a way of staring with her eyes that was very erotic and kind of eerie."Right, well I'm not giving it to you for free."This peaked her interest. "Well I could owe you, but I'm a little short on cash at the moment."I leveled off her stare and said, "I don't want money."Stepping closer to her she immediately understood. She smiled politely in a kind and understanding way that still came across as condescending. "Sorry sweetie, but you know I like girls." You don't. Another call came through, and it was my mother pleading for me to call, but I ignored it and unplugged the phone.In 1971 answering machines were primitive. In the future, in the digital computer age, voice mail and answering machines would become commonplace, but that was twenty or more years from now. In those days, an answering machine was a small tape recorder, and you had to wind through your messages. I had a very bland greeting on mine, simply stating we weren’t home, so leave us a message. In case Jeana’s parents ever called, they would think it was my parent’s number.It might have been the loneliest I have ever been. I won’t lie about it. I cried. In some ways it was even worse than when Marilyn or Alison died, because then I had family around me. Now it was my family which had abandoned me. I just sat there in the apartment until early afternoon, wallowing in my sorrow, and then decided the hell with it. Being miserable is only good in small doses. I opened a bottle of.
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