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.. could I?It’s not that I didn’t try and get a normal job to get me through uni. When I first arrived in London I got a job at as a waitress in a high-end Indian restaurant, where I worked for a month. But I spent more time turning down dates from my colleagues than I did waiting tables. That’s when I realised that I attract South Asians like a Dog would attracts fleas. It was not just the restaurant, it was uni. They chase me all over the campus. I’m not kidding, after lecture there will be a queue, ten deep, offering me proposals and questions. What are you? Where are you from? Please meet my parents. Will you marry me..? Fuck sake, it’s endless. They’re obsessed with me. They treat me like some kind of deity, so I started calling them pilgrims.The problem is, technically I’m one of them. I’m mixed race, half Bahraini, yes I’m as hot as the desert and half English – hence the foul mouth. I dress in Western clothes and possess a liberal attitude. The whole package drives my South. I saw it in a movie. Itwas my first time trying that and I got the wording all fucked up, butwe'll get him, you can bet on that!"Ten minutes later, a nicely dressed lady was sitting akimbo on thesidewalk as the gang ran off with her purse. Five minutes after that,in an alley, one of the gang took all the cash and credit cards out ofthe purse and threw it down to the ground.Dana yelled at the gangsta, "What the hell's gotten into you, that's aKate Spade!" Emilio looked at him like he lost his mind and Danahastily said, "I mean, we can probably pawn that pocketbook for somemore cash." Dana bent down at the knees so that his butt was rightabove his heels and reached over and gingerly picked up the purse andbrushed off the dirt. He then put the purse on his shoulder and stoodup. Realizing what he just did, he quickly took the strap off hisshoulder, clutched the purse in his hand and smirked sheepishly at hiscohorts. Emilio said, "okay, whatever you say, dude" and they ran offdown the.
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