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He has his girlfriend’s name, ‘Tina’ tattooed on his pecker.”So the nurse decides to go check it out. A while later she comes out of the exam room and tells the doctor, “You were mistaken about him. He doesn’t have his girlfriend’s name tattooed on his equipment, he has his ship’s name tattooed on it. The Ticonderoga!”These are compliments of Andrew B.A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing “Love” stamps on bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them. He then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying scent all over them.His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.The man says: “I’m sending out one thousand Valentine cards signed: ‘Guess who?’”“But why?” asks the man.“I’m a divorce lawyer.” the man replies.You may have heard about the Southern California man who was put under 72-hour psychiatric observation when it was found he owned 100 guns. I finally take my mouth off your neck, and still holding your hair I pull you into the dining room, swiping everything off the table and bending you over it. Your cheek pressed firmly against it as I run my hand down your back. As my hand reaches your panties, I tug them down and hard, the thin bands over your hips tearing with the force. Leaving them tattered and on one leg, I push my knee between yours spreading your feet apart. Still using your hair to hold you to the table, my free hand runs up your pussy lips long enough to aim my dick before I slam it the entire way inside of you. Your pussy lips wrapping themselves around my dick, as your pussy muscles tighten against my dick. I place my hand on your hip holding you firmly to the table as I continue to thrust in and out of you. I groan as my thrusts gain speed and aggressiveness. I pull back on your hair, bending your neck so that your eyes are almost at the ceiling, now using my hand to pull your hips back to me as I thrust.
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