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I hope you took some of my brother as well Chantelle. Do you know, Chan, I really didn't know they were in the country; did you, Vicky? I suppose their ship must have docked in Liverpool and Philip must have taken May-Ling up to see the Blackpool illuminations as well. You know their ship normally docks in Amsterdam."My twin brother is married to May-Ling, a beautiful little Chinese girl he met in Singapore some years ago. They live on a container ship where he holds the post of first mate. The ship spends so little time in port that a lot of the married members of the crew have their spouses with them. Oh, and by the way my brother and I are identical twins, just like my daughters. Twins runs in my family, handy that! Vicky was crying then and Chantelle was sitting there with her mouth open. So I continued."Did you say hello to Phil, Chantelle? If I remember correctly you had the hots for him at our wedding. But that was a long time ago, wasn't it."Now both of them were crying.. "Occupation?" No, just here for a few days."I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night.Or "foreplay" as she likes to call it.I woke up this morning at 8 and could sense something was wrong.I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do.Then I remembered "the local cafe serves breakfast until 11."Got caught having a pee in the local swimming pool today.The lifeguard shouted at me so loud I nearly fell in.I woke to go to the toilet in the middle of the night and noticed a burglar sneaking through next door's garden.Suddenly my neighbour came from nowhere and smacked him over the head with a shovel killing him instantly.He then began to dig a grave with the shovel.Astonished, I got back into bed.My wife said, "Darling, you're shaking, what is it?" You'll never believe what I've just seen!" I said, "That tosser next door has still got my bloody shovel."A man is seeking to join the Vancouver Police.
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