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"This whole thing affected all of us, Brian. I just wish we'd all handled it better." I certainly wish I had. I promised Reverend Gordon that I wouldn't tell anyone about Rhonda taking all those pills, but when that speech topic came up last week all I could do was stare at it and think that she was desperate and had nowhere to turn. I'm so glad we all know now." Me, too. And Brian, I'm still sad. Not just for you, but for all of us. We wasted two whole months that we could have been comforting each other. Things are changing again. We're all going to be seventeen this year. That puts the burden right back on us with no agreement that says 'no you can't.' It's scary." You know I'll back off if you want me to, Rose. We don't have to jump in just because we turn seventeen." Oh, we won't." She kissed me on the cheek. "But I'll want to, you know. The night of the twenty-first of December, I'm going to want to rush over to your house, undress and feel you slide into my wet little slit.. The next thing I knew I was in awedding gown, and he was taking me across a threshold. He pulledoff my dress, so I was just wearing a bra, panties, garters andstockings. He pulled down my panties and my penis was gone. Thenhe looked at me and said, "You're not the woman I married," andleft. I was left standing there, looking confused when...My alarm went off. I woke up with a start. I looked in themirror. My college roommate's girlfriend looked back. I went intothe kitchen and made some coffee. "OK," I thought. "Let's just dosome work, that'll take my mind off of it." I spent the nextthree days immersing myself in work. I never left the house. Ihad food delivered, which I barely touched. I never even wentonto my terrace. I figured avoidance was the only way to deal. Myclients, however, were happy. Projects were getting finished at arapid rate. Nothing like severe sublimation and denial to move aproject along.By the afternoon of day three, I was getting cabin fever. Idecided to look.
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