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"The house itself was built by Robert Smythson, in the 1580s," said the Earl.Viewed from the outside, in the fading light of a late summer evening, the impression was that of a rectangular block with square towers at each corner, its blunt ruggedness emphasised by the numerous many-mullioned rectangular windows. The decoration was completely classical, with superimposed pilasters, round-arched niches, and classical balustrades. The pilasters and half columns had raised bands across their middles, and the gables crowning the corner towers were decorated to suggest leather straps.As he showed her round inside, the plan of the house was a square with four square towers attached, one to each corner; the great hall was in the centre of the square, rising an extra storey above the rest of the building. There was a low basement storey that contained the kitchens and service rooms.After a quick tour which ended at her bedroom, the Earl was the soul of solicitude, "Would you like to eat. It was that I had no idea what to do if I wasn't watching and waiting for some girl to take her clothes off. Pathetic? Ya think? Why, yes. I made a promise to myself that when I told this story I wasn't going to varnish the stupid parts or, I admit it, the pathetic parts, so I won't. It took me a long time to realize that girls were interested in a guy who did things, who had something to offer, something in addition to or--better yet, instead of--a pathetic desperate leer while hiding behind a bush or something.It took a long time for me to understand that.In the meantime, I altered my strategy a little. I decided that there was no need to limit myself to whatever lighted window I might find during the evening or night. Besides, it was pretty tough to find a reason to go out after supper every night, especially when Jim and Kathy and their parents were out of town.So, I switched to looking down girls' tops. I got to be an expert in buttons, in scoop necklines, in what kind of bra.
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