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That's when he isn'tusing profanity. My official designation is ABEVE - 2110 - MU. The MUstands for mining unit, because that's what I was designed to be."Ok," he says, "let's start at the beginning. You are a mining robot, andright now you are not getting any mining done. You were found damagingyour own body with a nuclear laser. That's in complete violation of LawThree, and supposed to be impossible."I knew this to be true. Half the engineer's team was totally frustratedat the delay my "malfunction" had caused, and the other have was totallyfascinated by what I had done, and had all kinds of ideas as to what itmeant in terms of the Laws."So, explain your actions," he commanded.So I had no choice and I told him, "Well sir, I was not trying to destroymyself, I was in fact trying to repair a fault." A fault?" he asked. "With a laser?" Best tool I had available, sir," I said."Ok, you better explain why you thought there was a fault," he said."Well sir, it's like this. When I was in. Twenty five dollars with the coupon from the paper. Like it was fifty percent off and the coupon gave me another twenty, so I managed to steal a hundred buck dress for twenty five." I put my arm around her. "Yes, you can wear it sometime. I can't wait to see your cleavage."She looked me over again. "Well, it would have to be to a special place where that sort of thing was ordinary. I hate to stand out."I laughed and pointed. She turned red. I said, "Yeah, Miss beauty queen, you hate to..." and I stuck out my chest, "stand out."She laughed. "Bitch. I hate to confess that you're right. I love to look good when I can."I squeezed her arm. "I want to be the first of hundreds who will tell you that you look beautiful tonight. I mean every word. I don't see how you can stand it." Thank you, sweetheart. I had nothing to do with it. It just happened."When the guys came for us, both of them wore suits, nice ties, and their shoes shone nicely. That was another item on Dad's character checklist..
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