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”“Are you having sex with any of them?”“I really shouldn’t answer that, but I want to be honest with you. No, I’m not.”“Because you don’t want to or because they won’t?”“Because I’m not ready to.”“Hold on, you’ve had sex with lots of different girls. I know that for sure. You’re telling me that you won’t have sex because you’re not ready? I don’t understand.”“Let me clarify. With one of them, it’s not even within the realm of possibility. She’s a recovering rape victim. We’re friends. Anything beyond that isn’t even something that I could think about, and she certainly isn’t ready. With both of the others, there’s at least a possibility, but I don’t want to hurt them. I don’t want to hurt anyone.”“But you’ve clearly thought about it with me, true?”“I think about sex all the time! And yes, of course, I have thought about it with you. I’m pretty sure it will be amazing. And the same thing applies. I don’t want to hurt you. I’ve wrecked several relationships by having sex when the girl. I’ve been here to watch you mope all week about feeling abandoned and alone, crying ‘woe is me’ because the three of them have all declared themselves out of your romantic life: Dawn, DJ, and Adrienne. Yes, you complain that your life sucks and you whine about how things aren’t going your way. But don’t even TRY to pretend that losing your fiancée has been the great epic tragedy of your life.”I blinked at the fury in Kim’s voice. Leaning back, I gave her an evaluative look and asked, “Where is this anger coming from?”“You didn’t LOVE her, your supposed fiancée. Maybe you did before, months ago before you got distracted by DJ and Dawn and started going over to Berkeley as often as you did, but by the time you two broke off your engagement, you weren’t in love with her anymore. That’s why Adrienne agreed to end it: not because of Sasha, but because she could tell your heart was no longer in it. You didn’t LOVE her anymore. You didn’t DESERVE her anymore. You didn’t deserve to marry.
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