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I asked him what it was like to bang his own mother.”“Fuck, dude.”“You should have seen his face. I thought he was going to have a stroke. He about shit his pants.”“So he is banging his mother?”“Fuck no, man. Don’t be ridiculous. They got all embarrassed because she decided to pose nude for that art class, and he was in it. He didn’t want anybody to know she was doing that, so he convinced her and Maureen to pretend her last name was Hart.”“That was stupid.”“I know. Sooner or later somebody would find out, just like I did. And by doing that, they let people think she was dating him. Everybody knows he lives with his mom at home. Well, that’s why they always left together. He was just going home to live with Mommy!”“Fuck, that’s hilarious.”“I know!”Presto, because Phil believes it, others will believe it, too. It’s not me defending myself, which people can suspect is for self interest. Phil has no reason to lie about it, and no agenda, other than to embarrass me. That agenda is well. Jesse and I quickly conferred. Why was the dead man guarding the barbershop? What were the robbers going to do for a get-away?I looked at the door, then the back room door, and finally realized their plan. They would rob the bank, take the loot out the front door of the bank, race three doors down to the doorway filled with our now dead cowboy, and finally head out the back to where we assumed a crony waited with escape horses in the alley behind the barbershop. Dion had pulled the corpse out of the doorway. He was just in time, too. Two dirty and slightly singed bank robbers ran through the doorway, guns and loot in hand, looking over their shoulders."Hold it right there. We've got the drop on you. Resistance is futile. You can drop 'em today and live another day, or you can resist and end up like your large friend over there." Our big words and the glint of steel convinced them to give up. We had the drop on them anyway. They gave up easily, almost too easily. I got that feeling I.
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