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Mom busied herself in the kitchen. Even Dad was drafted to quickly run the vacuum over the public parts of the house. Once our Christmas lunch was on the stove or in the oven to finish cooking, the three of us set the dining room table with the best china, silverware and linens in preparation for my girlfriend and her mother.I don’t know how she does it, but my mother has an amazing sense of timing. We had barely finished getting everything ready when the doorbell rang, signaling that Becky and Katie had arrived. I was the first one to the door, with my parents right behind me, to welcome our guests. There were hugs all around, which was awkward because both my girlfriend and her mother had their arms full of presents for the three of us. Mom ushered them through to the living room where the presents were placed under the tree with our gifts for them, and finally Dad and I took the ladies’ coats and hung them in the entryway closet. There were more hugs after that, as well as a deep. Relieved, they call me back to the check-in nurse pretty quickly. She asks me what I am there for and I tell her I have pelvic pain. She doesn't really press me on my situation. I pray she can’t hear the whisper-soft buzzing come from my ass. I keep clearing my throat and fake coughing, just in case.Please stop laughing at me. You know, karma is a bitch. So, stop laughing.I am led back to a room and told a nurse will be with me shortly. Please be female. Please be female. Of course, a male nurse enters. Thank you, life! Or course, he is good looking. I have no idea why it makes me feel more embarrassed because he is good looking, but it does. His name is Mark, and he is built like a tank with blond hair and bright blue eyes. Oh, and his hands are huge... like the biggest, thickest fingers I have ever seen. Hopefully, he will not be the one dumpster-diving in my ass.“Hi, so I see you are having pelvic pain. Can you tell me where exactly it hurts and when it started?” he asks.Sigh. A.
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