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And so I began thinking of ways to open his mind to the possibility of pleasure with another woman, a surrogate, if you will. It’s funny, isn’t it? The thought of Jeff touching another woman was enough to send me into an emotional tailspin for many years. When we were younger, I protected my territory fiercely, hyper-alert for even the slightest hint of a come-on by other women at parties, and I believe I was physically capable of rending them limb from limb if they so much as smiled at Jeff in a flirtatious manner. Silly, now, to have wasted so much emotional energy on that kind of thing, isn’t it? I mean, if he were going to fuck around, it wouldn’t matter how she smiled, would it? The choice was in his hands all along. Perhaps now it’s in mine. About six weeks ago, just after my doctor discontinued the chemo, I had the idea of a strip club, the Déjà Vu, on one of Seattle’s busy streets. If I could get him in there, get him accustomed to watching other women in action, perhaps. And what was there to see,hard as I looked from something good? Norfolk. Norfolk, one more time. Andhere I am in Norfolk, yet again, and just to play the game again and hear:"I dunno. Maybe I saw him, maybe I didn't. Don't see a lot of Audi driversin here. What did he look like?"I rattled it off, like I'd been doing all day, checking around with theMedical Examiners, the hospitals, the jails, the airport. One R. RichardGentry. Five-eight, five-nine; not a big guy. Maybe an inch or two on me.Age, 35, looked it, maybe more. Already greying some: tough job, running alittle bank. Little town like his, it's like running the thousand-dollar-bill printing press. I'd never met him, just his wife. I didn't like himmuch, though. I think it showed."Nice," she said, drawing out the word. "I can see why you're chasing him.Though I gotta say, he doesn't really sound like your type, though,sweetie. I don't think I saw him in here. And yes, I come here often."I stood, shoved the stool aside. It.
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