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I woke up with a knock on my door, and quickly extricated myself from a pile of books, wondering how long someone had been trying to get my attention. It was Sarah. She was wearing a peasant dress, and her feet were bare. Her braids hung behind her and she looked at me beseechingly for forgiveness. I was so happy to see her, I whisked her through the doorway and closed it, but felt she might take it the wrong way if I locked her in with me. It was clear she was troubled, and I sat on Dana's bed to give her space to break some bad news to me while she sat on my bed.I asked her if she was okay through a thickening lump in my throat, and she nodded quietly, but by the way she averted her lovely eyes, I was prepared for rejection. She had been in the library all evening, afraid to keep the date she had made earlier that morning. I knew she didn't know how to tell me, and I felt as badly for her as I was feeling for myself. She was beautiful even on the edge of tears. I resisted the. Looking at her I could see that my reaction had hurt herand it crushed me. I felt myself starting to cry, I said to her "Alicia,I'm so sorry. God I'm sorry. I wish I could... I mean I wish you and mecould... I can't!!" The tears were falling pretty freely at this point soI turned from her to hide the fact I was crying..."Robbie what do you mean you can't? Why can't you? Don't you like me?"she said, the hurt evident in her voice. She grabbed my shoulder, turnsme back towards her and sees just how much I am crying. Really lookingconfused now, she continues, "Why are you crying? Robbie what's wrong?Talk to me!"Sniffling I tell her, "I never in a million years would ever want to hurtyou, but Alicia you and I can only be friends. I wish we could be morebut it wouldn't be fair to you..," My voice just drifts off at that pointand I look down at my feet.Suddenly a look of realization comes across her face. "Oh My God!! Areyou telling me you're gay? That would make so much sense!!" She.
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