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And since I seemed to be committing some sort of sin almost every night now, the whole thing had become even more confusing for me. Anna was wearing a purple bikini. She was taller and thinner than me. She had pale skin that tended to freckle and smallish breasts but a face that I always thought of as very pretty. She had a wide mouth with the kind of pouty lips I would have killed for and big, emerald green eyes. She also had cascades of wavy, thick red hair that always seemed far sexier than my dull brown. I guess in the overall scheme of things we were both quite plain, or at least average but neither of us was ugly. Even so, we weren’t in the same league as the beautiful girls at school, and we knew it. Anna was telling me bits of gossip she had heard from another friend, Lisa. Anna and Lisa worked together in their part-time job in a bread shop. Lisa moved in different circles to us. She mixed with the cool, beautiful girls, she went to lots of parties and she had a boyfriend.. Who do they really hurt in the long run?Who is the chump?The one who loves fully, or the one who pretends, lies and cheats behind the other's back?Always searching for something they already have, if they only opened their hearts and minds. It takes courage to open yourself up, to be so vulnerable, while the closed, protected shield cools the heart, keeping the stoked flames from catching and igniting the all inclusive passion of body and soul.There is the fear that one day, you can come home and find out that your life was a lie, a shambles of deceit perpetrated by your partner, the one person in life that you trusted, who in turn has dashed your hopes and assumptions, who mocks you with their actions, and reveals the mask of a stranger you have shared your life with.Who is the fool then?The surprised supposed victim, or the devious, nefarious liar? Have you as the giver of your heart and trust all this time together really lived a less full life compared to the partner that has.
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