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What would his friends or parents say if they saw him here like this? He imagined them walking in and seeing the situation for what it was: three adults having a decent conversation and an eighteen-year-old guy with an erection who was trying to peek up the skirt of the woman sitting next to him. A woman who was twenty-five years his senior and also happened to talk to his mother regularly. It was all just too horrible.But then he looked at her again and saw how she crossed her legs the other way. Vaguely he heard the swishing sound of her nylons and he felt his brain turn to mush all over again. On their way back Louise made some phone calls. Just when she was done someone called her. It was Alex’s mom, who was keen to hear how the past week had gone. Louise asked him if he wanted her on speakerphone, but he shook his head. He didn’t need to talk to his mom right now and was happy to let Louise do the talking.‘Your parents talked to Kevin today,’ she said after she had ended the. “So, what’s your wedding dress like?” I asked for the millionth time.“I told you,” she said with a smile, “It’s elegant…but delightfully slutty.”“Where are we honeymooning?” She asked me for the billionth time.“You’ll love it. I pulled some strings with some people to get it.”She’d planned most of the wedding, with minimal help from me, and I had, in return, taken over the entire honeymoon. We’d be gone nine days, two weekends endcapping a week of marital bliss. It wasn’t all that difficult to set up, so I’d been able to keep her pretty in the dark.* * *The day had, at long last, arrived.We arrived separately at the hill. Two tents had been set up for each of us to prepare in. Even though we were hours early, most of the attendees had arrived. There were the usual Hello’s and tears exchanged with proud families.I took my time putting on my tux, knowing it would take her far longer to prepare than I. After several minutes, I straightened my jacket in the mirror and checked my.
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