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Grandma got the home maker to dye her greying hair back to her original brunette. Strangers assumed we were mother and son since she didn't even look 60. I bought a better mattress so she (we) can have better sleep and another one for my old room just to avoid suspicion. We interacted the same way as always outside the house and with company. Grandma smiled and laughed a lot now, which was most encouraging. She ate very well. Her sensitivities and strength of the right side were improving daily too. She began to walk confidently using her cane. BIRTHDAYThen the big day finally came. I woke up in my old room because Grandma wanted to give me a full day of surprises. She was already up waiting for me to finish my shower. I found her in the living room. Her full length sun dress displayed her curves perfectly. 'Wow Grandma, you look so pretty.' She smiled warmly and we embraced and kissed. 'I used lip balm instead because I don't want lipstick on you face and wherever.' 'I just love. 6:33amI woke to the sound of birds singing and early morning light streaming in through my bedroom blinds. I knew what I would find, because it had been the same for the past two months. Slowly sitting up in bed, I could see my reflection in the mirrored closet doors across the room from me. What I saw was a women of almost 30, in a rumpled bed with the sheets tangled around her limbs and no one else in the room.There was the usual feeling of loss and fear of insanity and depression. All of these emotions came crashing down on me each morning when I realized that Jack had not really been there. That it had all been a dream. Intellectually I knew what had been happening every night wasn't real, it was just that... it 'seemed' so real.The first night that it happened, had been a week after Jack died. Of course, we hadn't made love for the last 6 months of his life, he was just too sick. That first night I just chalked my dream up to a vivid imagination and my sadness mixed with guilt at.
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