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Let’s move on. The image fast forwarded again, and God was around ten years old. She was in a t-shirt and jeans now, and the universe was much more colorful than it had been before. In her hands, were what looked like simple, plastic toys. This is when shit gets interesting, God said, here, is where I start creating life. You’re just putting playing with K’Nex. I responded. Those are nucleic acids, God replied, I’m creating a DNA strand. Look what I made! A single, green blob of wavering shape bobbed up and down in the void. What is it? I asked. A single-celled organism! God said proudly, A little less complex than bacteria, but I’m getting there! It’s uh… I trailed off, It’s beautiful… Hey, I was only nine billion years old, so cut me some slack! God said indignantly, We’ll just zoom past all the rest of this here…aaaaaaaand stop. So, before you look, just remember that this was my preteen era, and I was…angsty. God was now around twelve years old. Her head was buzzed on one side,. He was laughing.“You created her,” he said. “I’ve got this to look at.” Turning his head back to unabashedly stare at Rio got him a slap on the back of the head from Sandra, but she laughed, too. She still refused to move.Sandra was in her signature Cadmium Scarlet dress. That girl knew how to wear red! This dress was a one-shoulder affair that had a bow on top of her right shoulder. A tie passed through a slit in the left side and another wrapped around the outside on the right. Two knots that held this masterpiece around her body. I glanced at Walt again and he was nodding.“Sandra,” I whispered in her ear, “are you a virgin?” She giggled.“Not anymore.”“Did Santa bring you what you wanted for Christmas?”“Oh, yes. Santa came. And came. And came,” she breathed. “So did I.” I worked on loosening the bow on her shoulder but left the straps lying there so the dress didn’t fall yet.“Did Santa suck on your big fat nipples?” I asked as my hands stroked down her sides.“Yes,” she moaned as I.
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