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She had a son, you, but she wouldn’t even acknowledge me on the birth certificate, the scandal was too great. She loved you Guy, and she always has. More than the others I think, they were all born out of duty, you were born from love. Please don’t blame her, it was my fault.’ I looked at him pleading with my eyes. He was motionless. ‘Well, your arrival didn’t change her mind and now she wouldn’t even sleep with me so I had a vasectomy to prove I couldn’t make her pregnant again and we finally got back together. I was living two lives, running two families and both suffered but I didn’t care, I was OK. This went on for more than two years and god knows where it would have led but it wasn’t to be. One day Silvio phoned me, completely out of the blue. He wanted to come back.’ Again I looked at him and tried to keep a grip on my feelings. ‘It’s impossible to explain how I felt then, anger, despair, hopelessness, you name it. Because, you see Guy, I knew she would take him back even. None of the uneasiness and embarrassment of a younger woman, but seasoned, fun-filled fucking with a woman who knew herself and wanted entertaining.There were none.Well, what about a man? By this time, I had been communicating for some time with various spanking devotees on a number of chat rooms. Some were submissive, some the more dominant type. All were a good decade my senior and most old enough to be my parents. I had talked with some of the straight submissives about finding a casual female partner to teach me a lesson. There were so few, and it was an oft-lamented problem, they said. Most of the good ones liked to maintain control of the situation, so a spanking followed by no-holds-barred sex was off the cards. What I wanted would mean dispensing with money.What about having my bottom beaten by another man, they said? There was no shortage of experienced gay spankers who were always keen to show a youngster a thing or two. But, I'm straight, I said. That would be weird for.
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