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The moment I saw him standing on the trolley platform with that hungry look in his eyes as he ran toward me, I rushed to him like a feather flying on a gentle wind, and I hugged him tight. I gratefully slid my tongue halfway down his throat. Grateful for the intense pleasure we had shared for hours in a motel only that previous Friday, grateful about the mutual masturbation in our special stairwell on the previous afternoon after work on Monday, grateful to be in his loving arms again this morning, Tuesday…..and most of all at that moment, grateful for what we were about to share before going to work that morning. That Tuesday morning, as we hugged while awaiting our trolley to our downtown jobs, as we did every morning, I told him, “All that talk about me wearing my sheerest teddy for you has me so wet right now! I hunger for you, and I need you to take me back to our special stairwell this morning!” Even though I was in his arms the whole way into downtown, the 20 minute trolley. So, I ask myself, why do I do this? Why do I add this stress to my already crippling schedule? Why do I subject myself to the terror and potential embarrassment of rejection by the readers? Quite simply, I think I do it for four reasons: -to test the degree to which my ability to construct sentences may be construed as having a talent for creative writing, -to give a voice to my thoughts and ideas about the world, -to escape my real life by creating and inhabiting a world that operates in the way in which I want it to work, and finally, -to prove to myself that I am not a coward. The jury is still out on aim Number 1. Thankfully, I have had some wonderful comments in my feedback e-mails and in some of the public remarks about my stories and poems. Most of them speak about my readers’ impressions about the open way in which I speak about my life. My own thinking about that is that that is probably driven by the fact that I have reached the stage where I no longer care about that life.
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