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Shopping centers and outlet malls rolled by without a sound.“Alright, here we go. I’m gonna talk at you for a while,” Samantha said with some difficulty, keeping her eyes on the road. “You don’t gotta say anything… and it’s gonna be a little weird, but like, I gotta tell you this, ‘cause I don’t think anyone else can, okay?”“…Okay,” Emily agreed with a sigh, already familiar with the I know what you’re going through rhetoric she was surely about to hear.“So… yeah, well a few years back I was snoopin’ around in my Mom’s closet—that’s Aunt Rachel to you—and I found a buncha porno. Not like, video tapes, or magazines, or that kinda shit. I mean, like… photos. Home-made photos, buncha polaroids, you get my drift?”Uh… what. Emily blanched, crossing her arms and giving the girl in the driver’s seat a mortified look.“Yeah, I know, right?” Samantha laughed. “So, worst of all, Mom was in them. I like, freaked out. She was like, makin’ out with this other girl in some of them, and they were. Kali sat down beside me and put her arm around me. "Are you okay, Ed?" I'll live," I groaned."I'm so sorry, Ed. I never meant to do that. What can I do to help?" Just help me up. I'm going to sit down for a few minutes," I said.Kali got up and extended her hand. I took it and pulled myself up. We walked over to her back yard and I sat down on one of the deck chairs."Mary Jo and I are doing okay, I guess, Kal. She's a bit of an airhead though. It's hard to carry on a conversation with her." Oh, shit, here we go again, Masters. Every time you start going out with a girl, you have a few dates with them and then you start picking them apart. She has some tremendous titties, Ed. Don't they make up for being a little light in the upper story?"I couldn't help but laugh. "They might if she'd let someone touch them," I said with a big grin. "I'll bet she's got a tattoo on each of them that says 'Hands Off'." No, it says 'Homecoming Queen - Hands Off"." Kali teased."They're Handless Hooters,.
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