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I wasn’t playing along.“Well?!” she finally prompted me. “How was it?!”“You want the details of my afternoon with Cecilia?” I asked her skeptically. “How was YOUR afternoon?” I asked pointedly.“I’m just asking how things went,” she said defensively. “If you don’t want to talk about it, just say so.”“I don’t want to talk about it,” I told her, taking my bowl of soup out of the microwave to stir it and decide whether it’s warm enough or needed more time.“You HAVE to talk about it, John!” she argued immediately, like she hadn’t just finished telling me that she’d respect my desire for privacy. “What was it like? Was it awkward? You weren’t disappointed, were you? Everything went okay?”I closed my eyes and breathed through my nose, counted to ten, imagined myself in my happy place and all the other bullshit techniques to ease off stress. I put my bowl back in the microwave and set the timer for another minute. Then I went to the fridge to get myself something to drink to go along with my. It wasn't just the body transformation, part easy as such breasts andhips, part more difficult and painful, i.e. regular use of a mechanicalepilator on legs and arms for example. She insisted that I started to"be" a woman. As an example, she gave me toilet training. I now know whatit is to have to go to the loo urgently, to wait in line and then manageclothes, bag and shopping in an often none too clean public toilet. Thiswas all with the goal of being no more than an occasional woman, thoughhaving been through the process the act of "becoming" a woman, part orfull time is the same and demands the same dedication.Our first day out together was very strange as she wanted, I suppose, toprovide a sort of semi-public rebirth process. On the day she chose, aMonday actually as that was the day the boutique was closed, I dressed ingirdle, padded to give me the right shape, hips and tummy area, bra withlovely breast prostheses and tights. Over this I wore a shirt and my,that is John's.
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