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Cheap ones from Ikea. Four panels, adhesive strips, wall… job done. Who needs to waste money on expensive mirrors? I'm pretty sure there was nothing in the instructions about sticking a dildo to them and fucking yourself silly on it, but hey… necessity is the mother of invention right? Benefits of living alone #5 – inappropriate use of Ikea furnishings.After a moment of consideration, I stuck the dildo on the bottom mirrored panel. My legs were shaky enough, so I figured being on my hands and knees would give me an element of stability. I judged heights, stuck it on and backed up slowly to test it out. It nudged the crevice of my ass when I'd backed up far enough. Perfect.I grabbed the lube and spread a liberal amount all over the dildo. Even that act had me wishing he was actually here so I could suck his cock. I loved giving head. Like, loved it. Instant turn on for me. Zero to dripping in ten seconds.Open. Wider. That's it. Don't move. Eyes on me. Tongue out. Let's see how much of. "I left her standing there with a confused look on her face and I walked over to birthday boy and handed him his credit card receipt. He looked at it and frowned, "What's all this?" What? You expected I'd let you fuck my wife for free?"His eyes got big just in time to see my fist coming at his face, but not in time to send the signal to duck. I nailed him right on the chin and he went down like a sack of cement. Clara (his wife) came running over, "Charlie! What have you done?"I pointed at him on the floor and said, "It looks like I knocked him on his ass."About that time Loretta came up and said, "Charlie, have you gone mad?"I gave her a look that should have caused her knees to quake and said, "No my dear I didn't go mad - I got mad, and there is a difference."Charlie" Clara said, "What in the world is wrong with you?"Okay, I thought, why not, "When I heard your husband bragging about fucking my wife this afternoon (and I saw Loretta's face go pale) I got a little upset and so I hit.
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