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Over the past couple of years, her emotional life had become a grey monotone lacking excitement or fulfillment, and she lived day-to-day in a safe, undemanding but boring existence. By submitting to me she saw an opportunity to experience a kaleidoscope of excitement, a rainbow of sensual colors.All of this meant that I had taken on an awesome responsibility for my mother's emotional stability; if I fouled up, she wouldn't be able to return to grey safety. I was going to move heaven and earth to make sure I didn't foul up, and, in any case, grey safety would have been the last thing on mom's mind.I was up early next morning and sat in the kitchen reading the paper. I was completely absorbed in this when I suddenly felt two soft warm hands slide over my shoulders and down my chest. I turned to see my mother in a dressing gown, her mobile, expressive face showing uncertainty and apprehension tinged with fear, but, I was intrigued to note, just the slightest hint of desire, even. It will give everyone time to adjust to the consequences of the situation.’ ‘Doctor, no one must mention this to Stephano. He is having enough trouble dealing with this as it is. I do not want to see him break down. He will need his family around him, when the time comes to let Patty go.’ ‘For the time being, Mister Zabo, I will only write up the orders for the feeding tube to be implanted tomorrow morning. Noone needs to know about the DNR, except you, and the staff attending her. It will be on her chart, but the nurses do not talk about it, or leave the chart lying around, for everyone to see.’ ‘Thank you very much, Doctor.’ *** Stephano did not take his car to the church. He wanted the exercise, so he decided to walk. It was a very nice afternoon and St. Francis was not that far away. He had to clear his mind. He had to be sharp and on his best game. William was going to be making decisions concerning Patty today. He had to put his best ideas forward and see if he could lead.
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