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Miss Laura: Get over here by 3.Me: I’m at work. Might not get out of here by then.Miss Laura: 3 or never, Flyboy. Fuck, I thought and then said okay. I’d work it out and I did, though I’d be working on reports all weekend. Miss Laura texted a grocery list after that, including a couple bottles of wine. I needed to get all of it, requiring stops at two places, and get to her house no later than three p.m.Forty-five minutes and almost two hundred dollars later, I was back in my car and on the way to Miss Laura’s.At a couple minutes before three, I rang the bell and Miss Laura, looking more like just plain Laurie in a robe and white silk pajamas let me in. Even without makeup and her wet hair, I was stricken by her natural beauty. She looked more like a middle school teacher getting ready for her day, but definitely one I would have ached for as a boy.She ordered me in and shut the door behind her. She walked past me without a word, drying her hair with a towel. She smelled wonderful. She said, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m completely nude.” with that, she stripped from the neck down, rolled the dice and with an Irish brogue yelled, “Come on, baby, Mama needs new clothes!”As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up and down and squealed. “Yes! Yes! I won, I won!” She hugged each of the dealers, picked up her winnings and her clothes and quickly departed.The dealers stared at each other dumbfounded.Finally, one of them asked, “What did she roll?” The other answered, “I don’t know - I thought you were watching.”MORAL OF THE STORYNot all Irish are drunks, not all blondes are dumb, ... but all men ... are men!Global Facts About SexAt any given moment:FACT: 79,000,000 people are having sex - right now. FACT: 58,000,000 are kissing. FACT: 37,000,000 are relaxing after having sex. FACT: 1 old person is reading on their computer.You hang in there, sunshine!I don’t understand why prescription medicine is allowed to advertise on TV or why anyone.
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