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Meanwhile, my relationship with my boyfriend, Panek, had taken an interesting turn. Although things between us were becoming more and more difficult, we still had sex with each other. One reason for my continuing to fuck him was my growing jealousy of those who were taking Renaud’s attention away from me. My childish tantrum resulted in me trying to make Renaud envious of me – a move that failed miserably. Even flirting openly with other men failed to raise an eyebrow from Renaud.It was a curious contradiction – I had never been one to initiate relationships with men but my new found confidence gained through my tuition from Renaud had given me the ammunition I thought I needed to get his attention away from these other women.In any event, my jealousy was unwarranted – it was part of his work to interact with other patrons in his bar; to be the congenial host. Besides, he was a friendly kind of guy who made his customers feel welcome.My attitude to sex was also changing due to my. "What about me?" she asked, sounding like a little girl."Maybe you'd better talk to your mother about that," I said.So she went into the bedroom. She didn't close the door, but I didn't listen in, either. These two women had already decided my fate, one way or another. So I went to take a walk. It was one of those cold days, where the sun is so bright that it doesn't feel as cold as it is. I should have worn a jacket, but when I started getting chilled, I just sped up to create more heat.There was some heat being generated back in the house too, which I found out about later. Cindy finally had to admit to her mother that she wasn't a virgin any more - twice over. Jill didn't really mind that, having just experienced the same thing with the same man. She could relate. But she wasn't happy about having been kept in the dark ... by both of us. Still, it was a no brainer. Cindy loved me in a very special way, but she didn't want to jump through the hoops necessary for us to make a life.
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