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." Right now?" Well..."Perhaps you're more assertive with it for it being forced; or perhaps there are aspects of your old behavior, with the old viewpoint's underpinnings, that are striking sparks on her year-old manliness by their implicit presumptions."I don't know..."Within moments, you both can feel it in the subtleties of the interaction: she is a man submitting to being a woman for the sake of love and habit and fond memory. You are a woman asserting a maleness no longer yours by rote, and it shows: your approach is too overt, too brusque for the sensitivity of the changed viewpoints. The old learned finesse is gone, along with the easy familiarity on which it was based."Let's..."The clash is communicated by flickers of expression in a glance: you two need room to work this out.By unspoken agreement, rather than go up to her place, you two walk over to a late-night eatery where you are both well-known.Friends look up, take in the exchanged genders, recognizing the two of you by. In the seconds that he was naked,I compared what Terry had between his legs to what I knew I had, andtook mental note that we were the same. I'd never seen a naked girlbefore, but I knew that boys were built like me ? they had a penis. Butgirls didn't have a penis. Instead, they had a vagina. A hole of somesort where the boys put their penises. But Terry had a penis, which madehim a boy, too.As we grew up, Terry and I continued to be best friends, and I learnedmore about what would come to be. We swam at reservoirs and skinny-dipped in ponds and there was no mistaking that he and I were both boys.But at his house, Terry was expected to practice being a lady. Hemodeled dresses and skirts for this mother, practiced crossing his legsappropriately. His father was disgusted and clearly didn't approve, butafter a while his complaints ended and he simply seemed to be obliviousto the boy in girl's clothing.We hit puberty ? me a few months prior to Terry ? and our masculinitystarted to.
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