But now that I did know it, I decided that she wouldn't forget me.By the time we were done eating she remembered that we had talked a bit and the subject of the mile high club came up. She confided in her fantasy and on a whim she decided to act upon it. She remembers a very enjoyable experience but has decided that sex with strangers is dangerous and from now on she will limit herself to known partners.That last part was because I caught her thinking that maybe the experience was so intense because I was a complete stranger. I worried that if she began seeking sex with strangers she would at best end up with some serious STD's and at worst, AIDS or maybe hook up with some obsessive violent asshole. So I had her begin to believe that it was the acting out of a fantasy that did it. I figured that it was much safer for her to indulge in her fantasies with guys she knew and it would be a lot of fun for them as well.There were definitely some lucky guys who owed me Christmas cards from. Maybe I'll try her tonight. I know where she's coming from. I've been there myself, where she is, sort of."I plucked some grass, glad he didn't ask me about that. "Besides, if she's not there tomorrow what difference will it make? I said I'd be in The Program. They'll have to find someone to partner with me I guess. As long as it's not Dolph!" After what's already happened between you 'n' him? No way!"I shrugged, leaning forward to brush some grass clippings off Bao's headstone before settling back against Matt, his strength supporting me. It was nice not talking, just being close to him."You okay?" he asked after a little bit."Yeah. Better now. Thanks for finding me." Still, I felt unsettled, having him there right then. "It's just -- well -- this is kind of my time with Bao." Oh. Sorry." S'okay."He fidgeted a minute, then nodded, starting to get up. "I understand. Okay. See you tomorrow?"Still feeling confused I didn't try to stop him. "Yeah. See you."I looked up at him, squinting.
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