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“That’s to massage the St. Bernards, they have thick hair,” I said, shaking my head as she continued farther into the dungeon.“Honey is that a dentist’s chair? Are you studying to be a dentist?” she asked.Huh?“Yes, sure Mom, do-it-yourself dentistry is the latest rage!” I lied.“Jesus is missing from that cross, Steve-O,” she chastised.“He’s out preaching, Mom!” I said, exasperated.“There’s my sleep mask!” she chirped. “Why didn’t you tell me you had it?”“I told you all of this yesterday, Mom, but you forgot!” I said, trying to direct her back toward the exit.“Oh look, Steve-O, that nice policeman left his handcuffs here the other day!”Nice policeman? What the hell was she talking about?“Nope, those are mine. They’re for my new job,” I said as I had her almost to the door.“Why does that Ping Pong paddle say SLUT on it?” she asked.“It’s the dog’s name, come on Mom, let’s get you back in the living-room!” I said, my patience worn thin.“That’s not a very nice name for a dog, Steve-O!” she. After that, ointment and bandages after a bath should be sufficient. Let me look at your head.”“Glass? The mirror?” Janie turned her body and her neck a bit and let Cerise get a closer look at the swelling lump on the back of her head. The apothecary’s fingers were gentle, and probed down to the base of her skull and her neck.“You’re lucky for the plaster. If the wall had been stone here you’d probably be dead,” Cerise said with a matronly tone.“Oh,” Janie’s eyes widened. “It didn’t feel like I hit that hard.”“It will in a few hours,” Cerise said. “Here.” She pulled out another jar and a small cloth bag, then tapped a few pills from the jar to the bag. “These will help with the pain. Do not take more than three a day.” She put the bag in Janie’s hand followed by a small earthenware pot. “Smear this on your wounds. Use as much as you need. It will sting a bit.”“Oh fuck,” Tonya gasped as she looked at Janie’s back.“What?” Janie asked, instinctively turning and craning her neck. A wave.
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