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Which I don't! But I stray from the story, and I hope you can forgive me! After some chit chat I don't remember to well, since I was to busy panicking and taking in the fact that this glorious man actually was talking to me, we found ourselves outside the club, in the back ally, sharing a cigarette and taking a brake from all the noise inside. His hair shone even under the dull glow from the street lamps, and my heart was imitating a humming-bird. I know I shouldn't belittle myself, but I have never had much of a confidence in my looks. I am not ugly, but I just see myself as average. I am tall, but not very tall. I am built but not one that you would look twice at, passing you on the street. I have dark brown hair, just plain brown. No fancy chestnut color or anything like that. I keep it long since it is very straight and I like the feel of it when it falls down my back. My face is..well, my face. As I have no confidence to talk of, I just avoid looking in mirrors as much as I can.. Fuck! What a cunt lappin’ douche bag paper…Oh here it is”Richard Widemouth had just graduated from La Varenne, prestigious culinary school in France, and had decided to start his own business in Chicago. His specialty was salad preparation. Perhaps “salad” was the wrong word for one of Richard Widemouth’s creations. A salad made by Richard Widemouth was a full meal nutritionally and quantitatively. He was very good at what he did.The ad was just as he had presented it. It read…“I’LL TOSS YOUR SALAD!YOU SUPPLY THE GOODSI’LL DO ALL THE WORKSATISFACTION GUARANTEED!$15 RICHARD 555-5555 “Suddenly, the phone rang. Richard Widemouth answered the phone“Hello” said Richard in a voice that sounded like a friendly buttercup“Hi. I’m calling about the ad in the Reader. Is this Richard?”“Yes, this is Richard” said Richard Widemouth in a voice that was more persimmon than buttercup“Well I’m James and I want my salad tossed.”“Yes James I’d be happy to oblige! Where would.
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