In the conversations which followed, it came out that it was my birthday and then everyone started to make a big fuss of me and drinks started arriving and I suppose that gradually I started to unwind.I had on a little black dress which was backless and so I had a worn a large shawl across my shoulders; even though it was June it can sometimes get chilly in the evenings. As the minutes went by and Ken seemed to be getting more and more drunk in the company opposite, I was chatting to the two men either side of me about work and life in general when suddenly I felt a hand stroking my naked back. I swung round first to look at Paul, the guy on my left, and then realised it must be from the other side where a guy called Ollie was sitting. I shook my head at him and tried to shrug him off but he just smiled and then another hand – this time definitely Paul – started to do the same thing at the other side. I know at this point I should have got up and told Ken we were going home but. Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.The biggest lie I tell myself is...”I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”If God wanted me to touch my toes, He would’ve put them on my knees.Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet... Why do I have to press one for English when you’re just going to transfer me to someone I can’t understand anyway?Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice.At my age “Getting lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what I came in there for.Actually I’m not complaining because I am a Senager (Senior teenager). I have everything.
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