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I was walking through the cemetery this morning and saw a guy crouching down behind a tombstone. I said, "Morning." He said, "No, just taking a shit".2. When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realized that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole a bike and asked him to forgive me.The Stuttering CatA teacher is explaining biology to her 4th grade students."Human beings are the only animals that stutter," she says.A little girl raises her hand. "I had a kitty-cat who stuttered."The teacher, knowing how precious some of these stories could become, asked the girl to describe the incident.'Well', she began, 'I was in the back yard with my kitty and the Rottweiler that lives next door got a running start and before we knew it, he jumped over the fence into our yard!''That must've been scary, ' said the teacher.'It sure was, ' said the little girl. 'My kitty raised her back, went "Ffffff! Ffffff! FfffffF!" but before she could say 'Fuck Off!' the Rottweiler. Aunty: neeku konni cheppali.Me: cheppu ra.Aunty:ore naaku inka kinda tadigaa undi.Aaga leka potunna.Me:oh ok ra(naaku ekka modda lechipotundi).Nannu inka tease cheyyatanikiAunty: raa ra, neeku swargam chupista.Neeku inka vadalnu.Nuvv naa vadivi.Me:hm.Aunty melliga fingering chesukuntu,good night ani phone pettindi. Naaku raatranta nidre patteledu.Poddunne aunty intiki velli aunty photo meeda karchesa.Next roju msg chesi tanu ekkadi vachestunnanu ani cheppindi.Kaani maa mom inka vaaram untaadi.Nenu next roju clg lunch time lo tanaki msg pettanu.Reply lekapothe call chesaanu.Me:hello.Vachesaava.Aunty:eppude.Me: evening snacks kosam ravochaAunty: vaddu, mee mummy undi.Endukante nv emi vadava panulu cheyyaku.Nene pilustaanu.Vaddu gaani.Me:ok. Maa mummy aa roju evening bayataki velli 0.30 taruvata vastaanu ani annadi. Nv ee lopala, nenu aunty daggara snacks tenesi untaanu ani annnanu.Me: aunty maa mummy bayataki vellaru.Aunty: idiotMe: endukuAunty: photo enduku paaduchesaav.Neeku nijam ga.
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