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"Dave BarryBeer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 B.C.!W. C. FieldsRemember "I" before "E," except in Budweiser.Professor Irwin CoreyTo some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!Leo DurocherOne night at Cheers (TV Sitcom), Cliff Clavin said to his buddy, Norm Peterson:"Well, ya see, Norm, it's like this...A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members!In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster. " He said. "See you around k**."Mom was in the shower as I made my way upstairs and I went into my room to lie down on my bed. My mother stopped in her tight short silk robe that she wore sometimes to my embarrassment as it showed off her shapely body."Mike, I'm glad you are still awake." She said."Hey mom, I'm sorry things got out of control." I said feeling guilty of what happened at my game."Mike, I should be the one who is sorry, I drank too much, my stubborn pride got the better of me and I hate how arrogant Fred got as he kept winning. Can you please look past what happened and not say anything to your father, I will never let it happen again, I promise." My mother said with tears in her eyes."I won't say anything mom and I will tell Ernie that I don't want to see Fred over here again." I said to her."Thank you Mike, I love you." She said leaving the room."I love you too mom." I replied watching her ass sway as she walked out.Part Two a Few Days LaterA few days later I had.
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